Welcome to my first Thursday blog of 2021! Today’s entry comes in two parts.
A Realisation
I think we’ve all felt work stress before, be it from trying to get homework done at the last minute, pushing a deadline for a university assignment, or getting a product out of the door with your manager breathing down your neck.
But something I didn’t realise until the final months of 2020 is that there’s a certain kind of work stress that… feels… good?
I know, I’m as shocked as you are.
You see, I’m so used to my stressful times being for the benefit of someone else, or occurring within a structure designed by someone other than me, that I didn’t realise you could be stressed at work and enjoy it.
Last year I was working on a project with someone, and it went wrong, so it meant I had a lot of detailed work to do in a short space of time. I knew I had to to fix it so I could be happy with the quality of my contribution.
I found myself sort of ‘ringing’ with energy, and it felt familiar. Once I’d taken a moment to think about it, I realised I was stressed out, but, for myself? It was normally such a draining and negative feeling, something that could only be relieved by finishing the task (and sometimes not even then), but this time it felt like I was totally in control.
Is this what it feels like to be your own boss making your own stuff on your own terms?
I think… I think I’ve finally worked out what it means to have a career. So, I guess I’m just gonna have to build one of my own.
A Commendation
I had pretty much forgotten about this, but earlier in 2020 I entered the UK Songwriting Contest in the R&B and Rap category with my song, Unique. I entered at the recommendation of my old course mate, Regan, who enters her songs quite regularly.
What I didn’t realise is that the way to find out how your song did in front of the judging panel is to log into your account and check. I did that for the first time today, and found out I had been scored with a 4 out of 5, and also given a Commended Entry! They make a little certificate for you and everything.
That was a nice little lift for me today, on a day when things were a bit hectic what with lockdown meaning schools are closed.
I had so much planned for those mornings! So, now I’m having to rethink my work schedule, and manage that aforementioned positive stress so that it doesn’t become the negative kind. Thankfully, my daughter’s school has been absolutely stellar in providing her with learning materials and video lessons, but I’m still down several free hours a day.
I think a nice set of new lists is in order. Bring me my stickers!
The Grand Plan Continues…
In a mere two days it will be time for me to upload the first of the 20 videos I plan to produce this year.
This will be an introduction video, and also a mini-documentary of sorts, where I explain a bit about what has lead up to this project, and what you can expect to see from me in the coming year.
If you haven’t already, please subscribe to my YouTube channel so you can be ready and waiting to view my video on Saturday. I recommend you also click for notifications since my uploads will be a little irregular (though, always on a Saturday).
Time for me to get back to it! See you Satuday.
Caryl
PS. I’m thinking I might print out my certificate…